Make Time For Yourself

You have to make time for yourself. It’s okay to look out for your best interests. It’s all right to take all the time you need.

Do what you need to do, whatever that means for you.

There’s nothing wrong with being alone, being by yourself.

We’re more connected than ever before thanks to cell phones and social media. Sometimes it’s hard to put technology down and not stare at a screen all the time. That being said, human connection is necessary.

You’re a human being. Believe it or not, I’m human too.

You aren’t a machine. You need to interact and communicate with others. But know your limits. Remember them when you need to put your foot down.

Don’t be afraid to listen to your heart and your head. Because at the end of the day, you have to make yourself happy.

People respect you if you respect yourself first. At least, the people who respect themselves will. It’s tough though. But you live and learn. That’s how life goes.

Some people might not understand. Don’t worry about them. Worry about yourself.

Do what sets your soul on fire, even if you were the last person on earth.

What’s something you look forward to? What’s something you love more than anything else in the world?

Never let excuses run or ruin your life. You only have so much time.

Hold onto your values, your beliefs. Only change for the better.

Make time for yourself, so you can take care of yourself.

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20 Defining Moments In My Life Thus Far

  1. August 22, 1997: I was born.
  2. Whenever I learned to read. That must have been magical.
  3. When I learned to write. Quite possibly the best thing to ever happen to me.
  4. The first time I tried to dance.
  5. The day I started my first novel.
  6. June 2011: Elementary graduation. Unfortunately, I felt ill and had to leave early.
  7. The day I finished the first draft of my novel. This was a big deal then. It still is now.
  8. 2012: My English teacher at the time pulled me out of my math class and nearly gave me a heart attack. She told me an essay I wrote was going to be published.
  9. April 1, 2013: I started this blog and never looked back. What a fun April Fool’s on myself.
  10. April 2, 2013: I published my first blog post. Let’s not talk about the cringe levels.
  11. November 14, 2014: I attended a film festival, where I got to watch my own video on the big screen.
  12. June 2015: High school graduation. I didn’t fall sick this time around. Thank goodness it was only four years long. Four years too many if you ask me.
  13. September 4, 2015: My short story placed third in a writing competition.
  14. September 14, 2015: The first day of university.
  15. February 17, 2016: I got to watch a musical and perform a spoken word during its intermission.
  16. August 22, 2016: My 19th birthday. I also started journaling.
  17. November 22, 2016: I went to an awards ceremony for scholarship winners.
  18. April 2016: I started watching baseball more and more as the month went on.
  19. August 22, 2017: I turned two decades old.
  20. October 12 2017: I went to my first and hopefully not my last magazine launch.

Re-Evaluating My Goals For 2018

I figured the new month is as good a time as any to re-evaluate where I am and where I want to be by the end of 2018.

Dancing

I love improv. Sure, some days are easier than others. But moving to music often makes me feel better. Because I’m not getting any younger, dance is and will be a top priority for a while. Besides, I want to be a dancer as long as possible.

Writing

I’ve kept up with putting words on the page every day. I haven’t kept up with submitting my work out into the world. Hopefully, that changes over the summer. In a perfect world, I’d publish a poem, a story, something, anything. Alas, everything and everyone is imperfect.

Blogging

It’s my blog anniversary today. I started aspiringwriter22 on April 1, 2013. Guess I fooled myself. Seriously though, this has been one of the best experiences in my life. I have no plans to quit anytime soon, so I look forward to seeing what the next five years will bring. As of right now, I’m content challenging myself to create content.

Reading

I read all the time, but I’m not too caught up with reading a lot. When I have to leave the house, this habit suffers the most. Best believe I’ll be breaking the bank and buying books when I’m not broke. Ideally, I make some money over the summer, spend it all, and shut myself inside all day.

Journaling

Every night before bed, I journal for a few minutes. It helps me fall asleep faster. At least, that’s what I tell myself. I’d like to continue doing so.

I apologize for all the alliteration.

Making Money As A Writer And Blogger

As an overworked and underpaid (sometimes not paid at all) student writer, I have a terrible relationship with money. For me, it induces a great deal of anxiety.

Even though I’m still a dependent, I get so stressed over finances. Imagine when I’m an adult trying to support myself.

As of late, I haven’t purchased anything I don’t need. Which isn’t necessarily a bad thing.

I used to think I was frugal. Then I figured I’m just cheap.

To be honest, I haven’t made much money writing or blogging. That’s why I’m worried I’ll never make enough to do them full-time.

After graduation, I hope to get a job I like. Maybe one day I’ll make a living doing what I love.

I’m sure everyone and their dog would like to make more money. I want to make enough to survive.

I wish I could move past worrying about spending as little as possible or saving as much as I can. Instead, I want to focus on doing what’s best. Doing what I want to do. Problem being, I don’t know what I want to do. And even if I did, there’s a part of me that feels like I’m not good enough to do anything.

School, Stress, And Stories

I’m a little stressed about school and life in general. Make that a lot. But when I look back on February, I’m proud of myself. Somehow, I survived. I even read and wrote every day during a short but insane month.

Recently, I’ve felt at peace while reading stories. Thank goodness books exist.

Because some days didn’t work out exactly the way I envisioned, I haven’t been as productive as I planned to be. Which explains why there’s a lot I need to do in March.

I bite off more than I can chew. Even though I don’t have to, I load my plate full.

Yes, I realize I have high expectations and a crazy imagination. Sometimes they work in tandem. Other times, I feel like my world is falling apart.

I’m doing my best. I know I say that all the time. I’m still a broken record. No surprise there.

Unfortunately, I feel like my best isn’t good enough, like I’ll never be enough.

But if I can get through this, I can get through anything.

Even though telling my story isn’t easy, I intend to stay strong. More than anything, I’d like to live on my own terms going forward.

Walking, Thinking, Writing

I’ve been doing a lot of walking, thinking, and writing lately.

To be honest, I’m someone who doesn’t know what I think until I write. Writing helps me work out my thoughts. But thinking by itself is always welcome as well.

I do a lot of thinking whilst walking. Come to think of it, whilst is a great word that I don’t use often enough.

Whenever I feel stuck, I like walking around my house. I enjoy being alone with my thoughts.

Sometimes I write after a walk. I often have an easier writing session. Easy in the sense that the words come to me.

I always try to put what’s on my mind onto the page.

Life makes me feel pulled and pushed in every direction. So I appreciate being able to step back, being able to think.

Besides, we don’t have to be doing something every second of every day.

I’m all for action, acting. But I’m also a thinker as well. Having time to think just doesn’t happen unless we set aside time for it.

Don’t get me started on overthinking. But I encourage you to ponder or wonder.

If you could do one thing and only one thing right now, what would it be?

A Look At The Year Ahead

I can’t predict the future. But I can plan in advance. So this is my attempt to look at the year ahead.

I’m currently in my second semester of my third year at university. That’s crazy. Still, I’m looking forward to being in fourth year. Even though I’d love to ace everything, I’m content with not failing anything.

Right now, I’m excited for the upcoming baseball season. I don’t know why. Unfortunately that also means I’ll be making a lot of bad similes and analogies.

I have no idea what kind of work I’ll find over the summer, but I’m hoping to find something. On my own time, I intend to keep doing what I love.

It should go without saying that I want to continue reading and reviewing books all year long. My wallet will hate me. But my brain won’t.

This blog isn’t going anywhere. I promise to be more creative and less repetitive. My aim is to create content I enjoy. Here’s hoping you enjoy reading my work. Let’s see if I can keep up with being a good blogger and commenting on blogs. Probably not but a girl can dream.

I never know where writing will take me. I lied. It takes me to magical places. As always, I have some fun projects in the works. I can’t wait to share them with the world.

Somehow, I start my fourth and final year of university in September. That feels so far away, yet too close at the same time.

I also plan to drive more once I’ve fully recovered from the accident.

What are your plans for 2018?

Getting Hit By A Car: The Day After

I’m sore. I’m tired. Everything hurts. But I’m alive.

I have a story to tell, many in fact. I’ll be talking about this incident for a long time.

To be honest, I need some time to work through things. I can’t ask you to stick around, but I’d appreciate it if you do.

So much of my life has changed, yet I want the core of who I am to stay the same.

I suspect I’ll be a broken record on repeat for a long time. Then again, I was a broken record before. I’m even more broken after.

Before and after. That’s how I think about my life now. Before the accident. After the accident.

I’m trying to take life one day at a time. I can’t bring myself to think too far ahead. I have a long road ahead of me. Hopefully.

The physical pain will heal faster than the mental and emotional. I’m not sure all the pain will ever truly go away. Still, it’ll fade with time.

I like to think I can get back on track again soon. If I miss a day of blogging, bear with me. If my posts become boring, read something else. Life’s too short.

Personally, I write to make sense of what I’m thinking or how I’m feeling. So I hope to look back one day and know I made it out okay.

As always, I can’t thank you all enough.

I Was Hit By A Car

I had the right of way while walking across the street. A car hit me on my right side, and I fell down on my left.

After spending about half an hour on the ground and about 30 minutes in an ambulance, I spent another 4 hours at the hospital.

Waiting so long gave me a lot of time to think. I even wondered whether I’d tell anyone about what happened.

I know I’ll remember this day for the rest of my life.

Everyone told me I’m okay. But I don’t feel okay. I don’t feel fine on the inside. My body hurts so much.

Still, I realize I’m lucky to be alive. I’m lucky to walk out of this with my life.

Wrong place, wrong time. Accidents happen.

I don’t want to be angry or bitter. I don’t want to cry any more than I already have. I do want to move on.

That being said, I feel scared. I’m terrified I won’t be the same. I have no idea how much this incident will affect me from now until the day I die.

I wish I could brush it all under the rug. Too bad I can’t.

February 6th, 2018 was the worst day of my life.

A Much Needed Self Care PSA

Any day is a good day for a self care public service announcement. I know I’ve talked about taking care of yourself in the past, but I’m talking about it again because I’m a broken record.

I don’t care what season it is (baseball or winter). Remember to prioritize your needs, whatever they may be.

Say no if you need to. Fun fact that isn’t fun but it is a fact: I said no to prom. If I can, you certainly can.

Don’t forget to eat and exercise. Do the things you want. Read a book. Listen to music. Make time for your hobbies, interests.

Let’s also talk about drinking and driving. To be honest, I do not enjoy either one individually.

That being said, if you ever feel pressured to drink and you hate it as much as I do, put your foot down. This is your body. You know yourself best. Do what you want, not what someone else wants.

Don’t feel up to drive? Then don’t force the issue. Take a bus, a cab. Call a friend or family member. Listen to your gut. It knows what’s up.

Self care isn’t just about luxury either. You don’t need to go to a spa or a saloon. You can take a bath or do your nails at home.

Sometimes it’s the little things that make a big difference like going to the gym in the morning, going to bed earlier at night, etc.

I hope you treat yourself well in 2018. Don’t forget you have one life. One body, one heart.

You may be busy with work or school or a number of other obligations, but you’re not too busy to care about yourself and look after your health.