Taking Some Time To Reflect

I want to take some time to reflect on this year. It wasn’t always easy. I had bad days. But I’m in a better place now.

I’m content. I’ve been fortunate enough to do what I love. I fought and still fight to protect my time.

I’ve experienced a lot of things I didn’t think I would. Some good, some bad. Some downright awful. But I’m still standing.

I went from going through the worst to the best period of my life. And I owe a lot of that to a very special person. Make no mistake, I’ll still single. But a complete stranger changed my life for the better.

Little by little, my perspective has expanded and evolved. I’m not perfect, but I don’t need to be. I’ve done so much, and I am ready to do more.

Even though I’m grateful for all the big events, I’m equally thankful for all the small tasks. I’ve been able to get back a lot of what I lost. There’s still a lot for me to live for.

I’m alive. I feel alive. My smile has reached my eyes, not just once or twice but countless times.

That said, recovery is a long road. In some ways, I’m still recovering. That’s okay. I’ve been able to share this journey with some incredible individuals. So thank you.

On Turning 20 Years Old

On August 22, 2017, I turned 20 years old.

I didn’t feel any different at the time. But I’ve changed so much since then.

I have come a long way. I’d even go so far as to say the person I was yesterday is not who I am today.

20 years might not seem like much for some people. But for me, it’s my whole life. Now with two decades of living under my belt, I can confidently say that as I’ve grown older, I have also gotten better.

In recent months, I gained much needed perspective. I realized there’s a lot more to life than being popular or cool, getting straight A’s, etc.

I used to worry myself crazy over things that never came to pass.

I obsessed over a past I couldn’t change and worried about a future I had no control over.

I would overthink. Overanalyze people and situations. Read too much into body language or certain words, phrases, so on.

As of late, I’ve tried to focus more on the present. Cliché, huh?

Nowadays, I’m doing my best to live in the moment and enjoy myself.

After all, we only ever have today. We don’t have tomorrow. But we have right now.

The older I get, the more accepting I am of certain facts in life. One being humans are constantly changing. Hence why I’m making peace with the consequences, positive or negative, of those changes.

I did plenty of self-reflection this past summer. I had time to think, so I thought. A lot.

As I’m writing this, I want nothing more than to be happy and healthy.

I personally define happiness as being able to do what I love and actually doing it. If all else fails, I will still continue to pursue the things that bring me the most joy in life.

This blog is a little over four years old. But I feel like turning twenty means a new beginning for my blogging, my writing, my everything.

Cheers to all of you who stuck by a teen writer for however long you did.

I’m an adult now, which means I no longer have an excuse to create crappy content. I joke.

Thank you for making the past four and final years of my teens the best I could’ve ever asked for.

Here’s to many more.

Reflecting On Being 19 Years Old And Turning 20

Nine year old me wanted to be an interior designer.

Nineteen year old me wants to be a professional writer.

Funny how much can change in ten years.

Over the course of my life, especially in the last decade or so, I've discovered new passions and dreamt different dreams.

I never thought I'd be where I am today. I'm beyond grateful. I feel lucky in many ways. But I also know better than anyone how hard I've worked.

I wanted to take some time to reflect on the last nineteen going on twenty years. You're all going to be sick and tired of my old age jokes and indirect references to my birthday. Maybe you already are. I'd say sorry, but I'm not.

I had a less than ideal August in 2016 to say the least. It was a tougher time for me mentally and emotionally. So I was nowhere near where I wanted to be. And I was nothing close to being who I wanted to be.

Even though I still have a long way to go, I'm proud of what I've been able to accomplish during my 19th year on this earth.

I won't bore you with the details regarding my achievements. But I want to thank you all for helping me directly or indirectly, whether you know it or not.

I don't thank everyone often enough. Thanks a million times. Thank you so much for being you. I appreciate your support. It means the world to me.

You have inspired me in ways I never would've been. I will never stop reading your comments, messages, tweets, etc.

Around this time last year, I had no idea what to expect in 2017. I didn't know what the future held for me, for this blog.

Another year looms ahead. I can't predict what will happen next, but I'm excited for what's coming.

I like to believe the best is just around the corner.

I'm sure I'll make my share of mistakes in the next 12 months. Please feel free to correct me and my erroneous ways. Shove my mistakes in my face. I'm half kidding, half serious.

But I've grown up a ton. I can handle failure and mistakes better now than ever before.

I want to wish you the very best.

Cheers to growing together. I know there's so much we can learn from each other.

I never want to take any of this for granted.

After all, I had my share of highs and lows as a 19 year old.

But right now I'm grateful. Thank you again from the bottom of my dark heart and the depths of my big head.

You made my 19th that much more memorable.

It's been an incredible year. Here's to an even better one.

Hopefully, twenty year old me will be way smarter. A girl can hope.

A Confession And Reflection

I have a confession to make. I didn't participate in Camp NaNoWriMo this July. Explains the lack of Camp this and Camp that in my blog posts, doesn't it?

I began the month with every intention to write a novel from scratch. Writing 50,000 words wasn't exactly my goal. I just wanted to write a lot of words for a new novel I could potentially publish one day. Perhaps not traditionally but possibly.

Instead, I wrote a bit of everything. Some prose and poems, fiction and nonfiction.

I don't consider July to be a complete failure. After all, I wrote every day.

Even though I didn't manage to complete the first draft of a novel, I did come out of July with some good writing. Pieces I will likely work on further in the future.

I think I needed a month of writing whatever I wanted. Especially since I worked on a novel not that long ago in April. It's like I went straight from April to July, skipping May and June entirely.

Also, I wanted a slight break from everything. From feeling pressured to meet a certain word count, feeling obligated to stick to a singular story, etc.

I like to believe I've spent the past 30 days or so regrouping. I did some soul-searching wherein I ask myself what in the Herminia do I want in this life. And, to be quite honest, I still don't know.

Right now I want to continue writing as long as possible. Wherever I go, whoever I am a year from now or a decade down the road, I hope I'll always remember my humble beginnings.

I cherish the memory of when I first reached for pen and paper, when I finally let my thoughts flow freely. It seemed so easy at the time.

My first ever Camp NaNoWriMo coincided with an attempt at finishing my first novel. I'll spare all of you the boring details. But even now, I can recall a younger Herminia pressing keys with her not so nimble fingers several years ago. She had a blast.

So I owe it to myself to have as much fun as I used to or more every time I voluntarily face the blank page.

I Am Thrilled When People Prove Me Wrong

I like to think I’m a good judge of character.

Sometimes, however, how I regard someone is not a true reflection of who they actually are.

That’s okay though.

I’m more than thrilled when people prove me wrong and they end up being a better person than I originally thought.

It makes for interesting writing.

Quote About Reality

Your reality is the reflection of your mind.

Types of People I’ve Met

• Arrogant people who think they know everything hence they act more superior but in reality, they don’t know everything.
• Ignorant people who don’t know anything but they know they don’t know anything.
• Ignorant people who don’t know anything but think they know everything.
• Finally, and this is extremely rare (like one in ten billion rare) people that know everything.