Writing

How To Ask For Feedback And Apply It

I’m going to focus more on feedback for writers. But the following advice could be applicable in general as well.

Write down your worries.

In other words, what’s holding you back from asking and receiving help? Getting your fears on the page might make you realize you have nothing to be afraid of. After all, what’s the worst that can happen?

Find someone you trust.

You’re more likely to apply someone’s remarks if you respect the person. Which isn’t to say you can’t approach a stranger for help. Do what works for you.

Ask.

The answer will always be no if you don’t. Imagine how much your work will benefit if you have someone look over your writing for mistakes. Or at the very least, places for improvement because you’re a perfect, flawless writer.

Set boundaries.

Let the other individual know what kind of feedback you want. That way, he or she can focus specifically on your flow, grammar, structure, etc. Better yet, you get the advice you want, and you won’t be blindsided by a curveball out of left field. I hope my baseball analogies and similes don’t bore you all to tears by the end of the year.

Listen.

Don’t be dismissive, especially if you solicited their suggestions in the first place. Hear them out at the very least. They might say something useful. They might not. But either way, you have nothing to lose.

Thank them.

For their time and feedback. After all, they didn’t have to provide you with comments or a critique for that story you’re working on. Unless you’re paying them to be your editor.

Don’t take anything personally.

Easier said than done, I know. But remember no one is attacking you as a person or your work either. Most people are just trying to help.

Use what works. 

You don’t have to use every suggestion.You’re more than welcome to, obviously. But ultimately it’s your story, and you’re the writer of it. Not your computer. Not your cat. Not your chicken.

That’s all my tired brain can come up with. I hope this post is useful or at least not entirely useless.

Good luck asking and applying feedback to make your work better. That’s the goal. I believe in you. Put your ego aside. Improve your writing abilities. I like to think life gets easier. But maybe nothing ever does. Either way, you have what it takes.

Personal Reflection

Fears, Thoughts, And Worries

I’m afraid of very few things. Being late is one of them. But more seriously I’m scared of failing.

It’s not the act of failing that terrifies me the most. It’s disappointing my biggest critic, my worst enemy. Myself.

I can live with letting others down. I’d take letting everyone else in this world down over letting myself down any day of the week.

I know I will never live up to someone else’s standards of success or beauty. That’s fine. But feeling like I’m not living up to my own standards…hurts. A lot.

I think I’m an ambitious person by nature. I want to accomplish so much in a short period of time. But I also don’t know if I’m occasionally spreading myself too thin. There are days I think I’m not doing a good job of anything.

I feel like I’ve gotten better at not comparing myself to others. But I still compare now and then. Which is so unfair. Especially to myself.

I’m comparing myself to other people. People who are older. People on a different journey than I am. People I shouldn’t be comparing myself to in the first place.

I want to look at someone’s work and be inspired. Not bitter that I can’t do what another individual did. Not frustrated that I’m not half the artist he is. Not upset that I can’t have her life.

Worse, as a writer, I’ve compared my incomplete drafts to finished masterpieces.

But the thing is I don’t see other writers’ first drafts. I don’t see the rough work of all these authors. I’m not aware of the number of hours they worked. Or how many days they put in. So, to me, it might seem as if everything comes easy and quickly to everyone else in this world.

I guess all these things make me worry. For the future. For what’s to come. For my own sake and sanity.

Sometimes I wonder if I’ll ever be good enough. But then I think I shouldn’t feel the need to please anyone. To be good enough for someone else. I should focus on pleasing myself. Being good enough for me. And only me.

Writing

3 Benefits Of Journaling

I’ve been journaling for a while now, so I thought I’d share some benefits the only way I know how.

  • You realize how ridiculous some of your worries are.
  • You realize how ridiculous it was to worry about those worries.
  • You realize how ridiculous you were to spend so much of your time worrying about said worries.

There are plenty other benefits behind journaling or writing or whatever else you call it. In the interest of time (read: I’m lazy), I won’t include them here.

Writing

Word Counts

I hate being below the required word count as much as I hate being higher.

Who even invented word counts in the first place? I’d like to have a word or two with that person.

Let’s just do away with words counts. I can say with complete confidence that no harm will be done. No one will miss it. Well, I won’t.

Besides I’ll write as much as I think is necessary.

Right now, I am below the word counts for all my papers and essays. It worries me. I wasn’t lying when I said I worry and worry and worry.

Personal Reflection

I Worry And Worry And Worry

I worry about everything.

Even though I know I worry too much, I can’t help it. I am a worrier. Always have been, always will be.

I worry and worry and worry. Sometimes to the point where it’s unhealthy.

Let me throw out a random, somewhat trivial example. Every time I send an email and don’t get a response, I worry that the receiver hasn’t gotten my email. Unfortunately, people tend to read my emails but for some reason, choose not to reply to them. (Thanks a lot. I wish you knew how stressed out this makes me feel.) I worry until I can somehow confirm they have indeed received my message.

It seems like all I ever do is worry.

Personal Reflection

A Major Decision

I don’t know what I want my major to be. See what I did there?

How does one decide?

How can you pick just one major?

I’m only worrying about this right now because I have nothing else to worry about. Well, nothing major to worry about.

Except for the fact that there’s snow on the ground in April. It’s spring.

Canada is a weird country, sometimes.